Happy belated Mother’s Day moms! It was a joy to officially be the first one I celebrated for being a mom. It gave me time to reflect on the little things I love so much about it and the stuff I never imagined would be on the job description.
1. Cleaning poop out of the bath is as much of my morning routine as coffee.
2. I consider going to the bank, the dentist or grocery shopping my special alone time.
3. I have more photos of Audrey in ten months than I do of myself in twenty five years.
4. I will dance, sing or read books in order to get Audrey to eat her food.
5. I can hardly remember a time showering without my ears and mind tuned totally to Audrey in the other room and stressing by thinking of everything disastrous that could happen.
6. My husband and I compete over who has changed more diapers and who’s turn it is.
7. I will take full credit when others say “your baby…” except argue when it is my husband who says it.
8. I tried to be the perfect mom, but that is completely exhausting.
9. I dress her like she is my doll. And I re-dress her after my husband has.
10. I still get weirded out every time I say, “my daughter.”
11. My Vogue, Us Weekly and People subscriptions have turned to Good Housekeeping, Parents & Real Simple.
12. I now listen to my all time favorite, Britney Spears, and frown upon the suggestive lyrics.
13. I no longer head toward my section at the clothing store, I head for the baby section.
14. I no longer compete with other women and how they look, I compete with how their baby looks opposed to mine.
15. The only television I watch is Disney or “My Baby Can Read.”
16. I can’t imagine not having Audrey. Life would be so boring.