momma time

Stay-at-home and work-outside-the-home moms unite: We all feel overwhelmed

For those who’ve ever looked at a seemingly together mom and wondered how she does it, it’s simple — she doesn’t take a break.

You think she has it better, or easier than you, but really, despite living different lives, stay-at-home moms and moms who work outside the home are pretty much in sync when it comes to their complaints about stress and co-parenting habits, according to a recent survey of 1,200 mothers by and Forbes Woman.

Whether the day involves negotiating with a temperamental toddler or a condescending co-worker, working and stay-at-home moms agree — they barely get a breather.

From rushing to the train, slammed by deadlines to racing through the house, slathered in spit-up, moms can’t check out at 5 p.m. Stay-at-home and work-outside-the-home moms alike are still on the clock when hubby removes his tie and drops his briefcase at the door. According to the survey, 92% of working moms and 89% of stay-at-home moms feel overwhelmed by work, home and parenting duties. A full 84% of stay-at-home moms don’t get a break when their partner returns from work, and 50% say they never get a break from parenting. (But 96% say their partner manages to snag time-outs.)

Both groups (70% of working moms and 68% of stay-at-home moms) feel resentment due to the unbalanced responsibilities and a third of all moms say they feel their partner could step it up on the domestic front.

What to do? Achieving perfect balance juggling it all isn’t likely. But a girl can try.

Talk to your partner about your need for a rest and then start scheduling breaks. Book that mani/pedi and go for that girls’ night you’ve been pushing off. Let your honey tuck the kids in bed. It’s also important to tell other women about what you’re going through.

Just because you can do it all, doesn’t mean you should. –By Julie Weingarden Dubin for NBC

{ABC’s momma breaks: I agree with feeling overwhelmed and the only times I really nag my husband to spend time with Audrey is when I’m needing a break. So, there are a few things I do:

1. A lot of play dates and baby classes. This way, at least once a week I am getting out, playing with Audrey letting Audrey play with others and I’m getting to have mom talk. Look for mommy classes or a mom Bible study so baby can go in the nursery and play with others and you get time to talk to other women.

2. Date nights and girls night outs are very important. My husband saw my need for “me” time and we scheduled every other Tuesday that is MY day. He will come home and do all the house chores such as dinner, dishes and take care of Audrey while I can read, go out or just sit on the couch. It is important for me to be a wife and a woman again and not just a momma. I’ll take those baby food sticky clothes off and get dressed up on date nights! 

3.  Running. Audrey is tucked away in her stroller and I plug my iPod in and go. It allows such a break for me while baby is just right there.

4. Find babysitters. It is important you find babysitters that you are comfortable with. It is good for you and for baby to get used to other people. Invite people over and spend time with them- and baby- so you can get comfortable. I’m lucky to have a slew of friends that take Audrey (the kind of friends that when she screams for the whole two hours you’re gone, they still like you.) 



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